Robin Sharma’s The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari teaches a series of lessons about how to live a simple, fulfilling, and ultimately happy life. The lessons are given in the form of a parable, as Julian—once a wealthy lawyer, now a much poorer but much happier monk—teaches a former colleague named John what he’s learned.
The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari provides a basic grounding in core concepts of spirituality and self-improvement, such as inner peace and the interconnectedness of all life. Many of the book’s teachings draw upon Buddhist beliefs and practices, like meditation and accepting each moment as it comes; however, it’s written with secular readers in mind.
After suffering a heart attack mid-trial, famous lawyer Julian Mantle gives up practicing law and travels to India to find meaning and balance in his life.
Three years later he comes back, happier and healthier than he’s been in decades. His transformation amazes his former colleague, John. Julian promises to teach John what he’s learned in his time away, so that John can experience a similar change.
The lessons in The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari all relate to living a peaceful, healthy, and fulfilling life. The main virtues that Julian teaches John are:
This guide compares Sharma’s teachings about inner peace and fulfillment with other spiritual traditions and self-help literature. The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari offers a brief overview of many different spiritual ideas and practices; we’ll connect to other sources where you can read about those ideas in more detail, or compare them to similar teachings from different traditions.
Sharma introduces these seven virtues with a short fable, which seems nonsensical at first:
Imagine that you’re sitting in a beautiful garden, with a red lighthouse at the center. Out of the lighthouse comes an enormous sumo wrestler, who is naked except for a pink wire cable worn as underwear. He finds a gold watch and puts it on, then immediately falls to the ground unconscious. He is soon awakened by the smell of nearby roses and leaps to his feet with renewed energy. He looks to his left and sees a path of diamonds stretching into the distance. He follows the path and it leads him to eternal happiness.
Each of the seven virtues is represented by a metaphor in the story. Most of the rest of The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari is dedicated to explaining and exploring those metaphors.
Religions and other spiritual traditions often teach through stories like this one. Even the Bible, perhaps the most influential religious text in history, is commonly considered to be allegorical or metaphorical, rather than literal.
Instead of directly telling you what the lessons are, such traditions rely on imagery and metaphors to get the student thinking for him or herself. The student, guided by the teacher, must then explore the metaphors and find the lessons within them.
When you personally engage with the material, rather than memorizing lessons by rote, you’re more likely to remember and apply the lessons.
The beautiful garden is a metaphor for your mind. Just like you have to watch and tend a garden, you should watch and tend the thoughts that you allow into your mind. This is the first of the seven virtues. When you let your garden get polluted with worries and anxieties, you waste your mental energy and can cause serious long-term damage to your creativity, motivation, and even your general mood.
Gardens are typically metaphors for paradise: beautiful places that are free from pain. The most famous example of this metaphor is the Garden of Eden, where Adam and Eve lived in perfect happiness before the fall of humanity.
However, while Eden was a garden that God created and maintained, Sharma makes it clear that you’re responsible for your own mental “garden.”
Thus, Sharma uses the garden metaphor to deliver two messages at once:
Your mind can be a paradise, but—
You have to work to make it one
Your mind is the one thing in the world that you have total control of. You can’t always control what happens, but you can control how you respond to it. Therefore, learning how to manage your thoughts is key to learning how to manage your life.
However, to master your mind you have to train it, just like you would work to strengthen a muscle. Two powerful mental exercises are meditation and Opposition Thinking.
In simple terms, meditation is the practice of sitting quietly and thinking about a particular topic. However, it requires absolute focus on that topic, which is more difficult than it seems. At first, you might find it hard to sit for even 10 minutes without getting distracted by unrelated thoughts, or by what’s going on around you.
By meditating daily, you’ll achieve greater control over your mind and your thoughts—those unrelated thoughts will intrude less often, and you’ll be able to dismiss them more easily when they do. You’ll find that ability carries over into your regular life as well: You’ll focus more easily and think more deeply than you could before, and you’ll be better able to keep your thoughts from wandering.
A candle meditation is a traditional exercise for people who are just beginning to learn how to meditate.
In a candle meditation, you light a candle and stare at it. While doing this, you focus completely on the candle’s flame; any thoughts that aren’t related to observing the candle should be acknowledged, and then immediately dismissed. Over time, you should find that fewer and fewer thoughts intrude on your meditation.
The purpose of a candle meditation is to give you something real and visible to focus your thoughts on—many people find that more natural than closing their eyes and focusing on nothing.
Opposition Thinking is the practice of recognizing when a negative thought is creeping into your mind, and immediately replacing it with a positive one. It works on the premise that, while the human mind can jump between thoughts very quickly, it can only ever hold one at a time.
Your mind will attract what you want into your life, so training your mind to attract the right things will have a huge impact on you and your surroundings.
Julian offers John two possible ways to tend his mental “garden,” but there are countless different practices designed to strengthen your control over your own thoughts and improve your overall mental health.
For example, James Allen’s 1902 self-help book As a Man Thinketh suggests that you constantly resist negative thoughts and only indulge in positive thoughts. That book also echoes what Sharma says about how training your mind is like exercising a muscle: that it’ll take time and sustained effort to master your thoughts.
The lighthouse is a metaphor for purpose, which guides you through hard times like a lighthouse guides ships through dark nights and storms. Everybody on Earth has a purpose, and special talents and gifts to help accomplish it. Fulfilling your own purpose is the only way to live a truly fulfilling life.
(Shortform note: Light (and, by extension, a lighthouse) is a common symbol in religious texts as well as literary ones. Christianity in particular frequently refers to Jesus as a guiding light, and the purpose of Christianity is to serve Jesus. Regardless of your own religious leanings (or lack of them), this example shows how a clear purpose can guide you through life.)
However, your purpose should be something that helps people in some way. Whether it’s teaching them the secrets of enlightenment, like Julian, or painting lovely pictures for them to enjoy, your purpose should somehow enrich the lives of others.
To feel fulfilling, your purpose must also be something that you’re passionate about. Passion is the most powerful fuel in the world, so use it to find and strive toward your goals.
Find your ultimate purpose in small steps by setting clear, specific goals for yourself in all areas of your life, then working steadily toward them. Keep a notebook filled with goals, along with reasonable timeframes to achieve them.
Julian teaches John that finding his purpose, and focusing his energy on that purpose, is crucial to living a happy and fulfilling life. Other philosophical traditions—some of which are quite different from the Buddhist-based teachings that Julian’s sharing with John—also emphasize the importance of purpose. Thus, it’s clear that many different types of people thought it was important to find one’s purpose in life.
For example, purpose is also a key part of Stoicism, a philosophy that seems to be the polar opposite of Julian’s new philosophy. It suggests that you set aside any selfish thoughts or feelings, and devote every moment of your life to fulfilling your duty (whatever that duty might be). Stoicism’s dispassionate workaholism actually resembles Julian’s old life more so than his current one.
If you’re interested in Stoicism’s approach to finding your purpose, check out our guide to Marcus Aurelius’s Meditations.
The sumo wrestler is a metaphor for kaizen, a Japanese word that can be translated as continuous, endless self-improvement. In this case, it means constantly training and improving your inner self. Improving yourself is one key to improving your life.
(Shortform note: The word kaizen usually refers to improving a company, rather than a person. For example, Toyota is known for its company culture of kaizen. However, whether it’s applied to a multinational corporation or an individual, the principle is the same: improving a little bit every day.)
You can practice kaizen by continually pushing yourself past where you think your limits are. For example, if you’re afraid of being in front of an audience, try out for community theater; or, if you think that you can’t do a pull-up, buy a pull-up bar and try it (and, if needed, keep working until you can do pull-ups).
In short, identify what fears and worries are holding you back, then face them head-on. Confront your limits day after day until you break through them.
To understand this metaphor, remember that sumo wrestlers are athletes, even though they don’t have the trim and toned builds that Western cultures typically associate with athleticism.
Athletes commonly represent human perfection—ideals that people should aspire to. However, in this fable, Sharma is more concerned with how athletes become perfect: through constant training and improvement. Thus, the ideal that Sharma wants you to aspire to is endless self-improvement.
Kaizen means trying to be a little better each day. While it usually refers to a business practice, Sharma wants you to apply that same principle to yourself.
The sumo wrestler’s pink wire cable is a metaphor for discipline. Wire cables are made of many thin wires wrapped around each other, and together those weak wires become very strong. Discipline works the same way: It’s made of many small habits and practices, all reinforcing each other to create immense inner strength.
You can strengthen your mind through appropriate exercises, just like you can strengthen your body at the gym. Little things—for example, doing chores when you don’t want to—will help to build up your discipline. You may be tempted to fall back into your old ways, but it’ll get easier every day as you keep building up your wire cable.
(Shortform note: You might already have some of the wires that will eventually form your cable. If you’ve begun practicing some of Sharma’s Rituals of Health and Happiness (for instance, exercising, eating well, and reflecting on your day), or if you have other habits that keep you fit and focused, then you’ve already begun building your wire cable of discipline!)
The watch is a metaphor for time. Time is your most precious resource, and those who spend it wisely will lead rich, fulfilling lives.
Eighty percent of what you achieve comes from 20% of what you do (the 80/20 Rule). Think about all the things you do in a day, then think about which of those things will have a lasting impact on your life. Most likely you’ll only come up with a few things that really matter in the long run; those are the things to devote your time and energy to.
The 80/20 Rule and the Size Instinct
In Factfulness, Hans Rosling explains that the 80/20 Rule (also known as the Pareto Principle) applies to everything from causes of death to items in a budget—20% of the items in each dataset cause 80% of the results in that dataset. One scientific study even suggests that the 80/20 Rule might be a result of the natural law of entropy.
Rosling also says that we recognize the 80/20 Rule when we overcome the size instinct. The size instinct is the human tendency to overestimate how important a single fact or piece of data is when it’s presented without context.
For example, if someone told you that Amazon’s stock price had dropped by nearly $15 yesterday, that would sound like an enormous amount of money to lose in a day. However, if they then told you that was only 0.45% of the stock’s value, you’d recognize that drop for the minor fluctuation that it really is.
Therefore, when you examine your own day-to-day life, look for the few things you do that have the greatest impact—and don’t get distracted by contextless events. For example, if you made an extra $50 one day from selling something on eBay, consider the time you spent and the money you made in the context of your entire day, and your entire income. How much of a difference did that sale really make, and how much time did it cost you?
Rather than spend a stressful day scrambling to catch up on all the things you have to do, take 15 minutes the night before to plan your next day. Better yet, take an hour on your day off to plan your entire week. Don’t just schedule your professional obligations, either; make time for friends and family, for meditation and self-improvement, and for rest.
Write your schedule down, and make sure you stick to it. It’s human nature to put off or avoid unpleasant tasks, but the happiest people are those who accept short-term discomfort for long-term benefits.
Also, be careful around people who will try to steal your time. These are the people who interrupt you on your lunch break, or call you at home when you’re in the middle of something important. Don’t be afraid to tell them “no.” Protect your time ruthlessly, including your time to rest.
(Shortform note: This section’s lesson is simple: No matter who you are or what your current situation is, you have the same 24 hours a day as everyone else. Mastery of that time leads to mastery of your life.)
The roses are a metaphor for serving others. An old Chinese proverb says that a bit of perfume will stay on the hand that gives away a rose. In other words, by being kind to others you’ll improve your own life as well.
The sumo wrestler from the fable—who fainted when he realized that his time was limited—smells some nearby flowers and immediately wakes up, showing even more energy and vigor than he had before. This is because he now knows what to do with his limited time: help others. He’s energetic because he’s happy with his new purpose, and excited to get started on it.
Thus, in keeping with the Chinese proverb, Sharma’s saying that you can live a happy and fulfilling life by devoting yourself to doing good deeds for others.
No matter how rich you become, after you die you’ll have nothing. Therefore, serving only yourself is ultimately pointless; the real reason people exist is to serve others.
Take a little time every day to think about the good that you can do for others. These don’t have to be huge, dramatic things; small favors like letting a car pass you, or giving a friendly smile to someone, will add up to major changes in your life and the world around you.
One of the best ways to improve your own life is by helping your friends and loved ones, and keeping your relationships strong. Those people, in turn, will enrich your experiences.
In short, see yourself as part of a larger, interconnected world, rather than as an individual.
(Shortform note: It would be impossible to tell you exactly how to help the people in your life. Everyone has different needs and different talents to help meet those needs. That’s why this section emphasizes relationships, rather than specific actions—by maintaining your friendships, doing kind gestures for one another, and practicing open, honest communication, you’ll come to understand the best ways to help each other.)
The path of diamonds is a metaphor for living in the moment. People who give themselves fully to the present, without being distracted by regrets about the past or fears for the future, are constantly reinvigorated by everything they do.
The path of diamonds is a reference to Vajrayana Buddhism (vajrayana can be translated as “diamond path” or “diamond way”). Vajrayana teaches that there’s no clear distinction between what people might call good and bad, or holy and profane—it teaches you to accept things for what they are, instead of judging and labeling them. By doing so, you remain present and focused, rather than lost in your own thoughts and judgments.
In simple terms, the path of diamonds represents Sharma’s belief that being fully present in each moment as it happens is like walking down an endless, impossibly beautiful road. According to Sharma, you’ll never reach the end of the path of diamonds, but you’ll be happy for as long as you’re walking on it.
Live your life now, not at some uncertain time in the future like after you retire, or after you win the lottery. Money isn’t the key to happiness; living in the present and appreciating all it has to offer is. Many of the previous lessons will help you to focus on and appreciate the present, without being distracted by intrusive thoughts or worries.
The reason it’s a path is that happiness is a process, not a destination. It’s important to have goals and dreams, as we’ve discussed before, but don’t sacrifice life’s little joys and pleasures to achieve those goals.
“Live in the moment” is a lesson that bridges many different schools of thought, and therefore one that’s worth thinking about.
Stoicism would argue that, rationally, there’s no benefit to worrying about the past or the future; all you can do is make the best choice possible in the present moment.
Hinduism and Buddhism would say that you mustn’t let events take root in your mind. Instead, you should experience each moment as it comes, and then let it go when it’s over.
Any number of secular self-help books suggest the same thing: Dwelling on the past or worrying about the future is a waste of time and energy.
Lori Gottlieb’s memoir Maybe You Should Talk to Someone is all about how she learned to live in the moment, and why that skill was so important as she struggled with an unexpected breakup and a midlife crisis.
The end goal of all these lessons is reaching Nirvana, a perfect state of being. A person in Nirvana is perfectly happy and content, sees the beauty and divinity in every little thing, and experiences no pain or fear.
In both Buddhism and Hinduism, Nirvana is the ultimate goal of every living being. However, while Sharma describes Nirvana as a state of perfect peace and happiness, more traditionally it means the end of your individual existence.
According to Buddhism and Hinduism, reaching Nirvana means that your soul unites with God, and you’re freed from the cycle of death and reincarnation. In other words, the lifetime in which you reach Nirvana will be your last.
Those religions see life—and therefore reincarnation—as suffering; they seek to free people from that suffering. In contrast, Sharma is trying to make the life you have more meaningful and enjoyable.
Anyone can attain Nirvana through small, incremental steps, as laid out in the preceding lessons. All it takes is a bit of time and effort every day, and an open mind to learn all the lessons that life has to teach.
The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari is a parable centered on Julian, a hotshot-lawyer-turned-monk, and his former colleague John. Julian shares with John what he’s learned from studying with the Sages of Sivana, a near-mythological group of monks in India who know the secrets to enlightenment.
Julian’s lessons range from gaining control of your thoughts, to finding a purpose in life, to properly managing your time so that you can achieve that purpose. All of this works toward the ultimate goal of living a simple, fulfilling, and happy life.
Robin Sharma is a world-renowned author, speaker, life coach, and leadership expert. He was born in Uganda to Indian parents, Shiv and Shashi Sharma. The family moved to Canada during Sharma’s childhood.
Sharma started his career as a litigation lawyer, but he found the work unfulfilling. He quit law and self-published his first self-help book, MegaLiving: 30 Days to a Perfect Life, in 1994.
The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari was Sharma’s second book, and it became a worldwide hit. With this book’s success, Sharma found himself in demand as a life coach and motivational speaker. In 1997 he founded the management consulting firm Sharma Leadership International.
Today, Sharma gives talks and runs workshops for major organizations all over the world, ranging from Nike to NASA. His books about leadership and self-improvement have sold over 15 million copies worldwide.
Other popular books by Robin Sharma include The Saint, the Surfer, and the CEO, and The 5AM Club.
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Robin Sharma initially self-published The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari in 1996. Three years later, in 1999, HarperCollins republished it for commercial distribution.
While the events of The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari are fictional, they’re based on Sharma’s own experiences.
As discussed, Sharma never found peace or satisfaction working as a lawyer, and his wife divorced him due to his hectic work schedule. Sharma quit law in his twenties and, with the support of his parents, pursued a career in writing instead. Many of the core lessons in The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari come from life lessons that Sharma learned from his parents.
The character Julian Mantle lived an exaggerated version of Sharma’s own life story. Rather than recognizing his own unhappiness and quitting law early, he kept going until he suffered a heart attack. Rather than adjusting his lifestyle based on life lessons from Indian parents, Julian traveled to India to study with a mythical group of sages. Now, Julian is passing on what he’s learned to his friend John, just as Sharma is passing on what he’s learned to his readers.
The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari provides a basic grounding in core concepts of spirituality and self-improvement, such as inner peace and the interconnectedness of all life. Many of the book’s teachings draw upon Buddhist beliefs and practices, like meditation and accepting each moment as it comes; however, it’s written with secular readers in mind.
The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari has been translated into 51 languages and has sold over 4 million copies worldwide.
The book’s success cemented Robin Sharma’s position as a renowned author and self-help guru and kicked off a series of bestselling books, including:
Fans praise The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari for its simple, straightforward lessons and accessible writing style. Mark Victor (co-author of Chicken Soup for the Soul) said the book was “Nothing less than sensational.”
Critics argue that the lessons in The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari are so oversimplified that they’re useless, or that the book’s just restating lessons that any number of other self-help books teach. Some also feel that the parable format feels childish.
The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari is a parable, meaning that it’s in the form of a story rather than a list of lessons or commandments. This style is intended to engage the reader’s imagination and interest—it gets you thinking instead of just memorizing, which is helpful in figuring out how to apply the book’s spiritual lessons to your own life.
The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari gives basic overviews of many different spiritual concepts—summed up in the Seven Virtues that Julian teaches to John—as well as offering guidance on how to start applying those virtues to your own life. This makes it a good introduction for readers new to Eastern spirituality. That said, The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari’s wide array of ideas and practices might overwhelm the reader—it seems impossible to practice everything that Sharma recommends. He suggests each reader take away whatever lessons and exercises are useful to him or her, rather than feeling pressured to remember and practice them all.
This book contains several stories layered on top of each other. The “top layer” is Julian speaking to John. Within that story is the story that Julian’s telling about his time in India. Within Julian’s story is a third story: a short parable that one of the monks told him, which contains the Seven Virtues that this book seeks to teach the reader.
Despite the layered narratives, The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari is easy to follow. Most of the story happens within the first “layer,” as Julian passes along what he’s learned to John. This narrative structure allows John to take the place of the reader and ask questions that Robin Sharma anticipated his readers would ask about the lessons.
In this guide, we’ll explore The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari as an introduction to spirituality and philosophy. In addition to examining Sharma’s teachings, we’ll build connections to other texts that explore certain ideas in more depth (such as The Power of Now explaining how to “live in the moment”), and to other philosophical traditions with similar teachings (such as Stoicism’s emphasis on understanding your purpose).
The first six chapters of The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari are short—only about a fifth of the book’s total pages—and are devoted to introducing the characters and the setting. To highlight the lessons in the last seven chapters, we’ve reorganized the narrative of the first six chapters into a single section.
Each of the remaining seven chapters is devoted to one of the Seven Virtues: Each chapter explains what the virtue is, why it’s important, and how to begin practicing it in your own life. As in the story, this allows each piece of information to flow logically to the next. Furthermore, it’s helpful to keep the narrative arc intact so that we can frame the lessons in terms of the conversation between Julian and John.
The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari is a parable, a story meant to teach a lesson. It seeks to teach readers different methods to manage their thoughts, their time, and their lives. By following these lessons, Sharma promises that you can find personal fulfillment and inner peace.
The book contains several parables layered on top of each other: Julian, a lawyer-turned-monk, tells a former colleague named John about his travels in India and how he learned to master himself and take back control of his life. He has a lot to teach, and John is willing to learn.
Within the Julian-John story is another layer about Julian’s time in India, where he studied with the Sages of Sivana and learned the secrets of enlightenment. Within that story is a fable Julian learned from his primary teacher, Yogi Raman. Raman’s story contains metaphors for the seven main lessons Julian learned from the Sages, and which John (and, by extension, the reader) will now learn from Julian.
Julian Mantle is a successful, famous, and wealthy lawyer. He seems to have it all: a mansion, expensive Armani suits, a private island, and his prized red Ferrari.
However, the stress of Julian’s job wears him down. He continually takes on more and more work, and never finds time to relax. He’s a perfectionist who tries to think of, and cover, every remote possibility before going to trial. Eighteen-hour work days are common for him and John, his intern. Julian copes with the stress of his job by eating, smoking, and drinking too much. His unhealthy lifestyle has made him fat, and he looks older than he is.
Julian’s life at the beginning of this story is what many people dream of having for themselves. By working hard, he’s become rich and well-known in his profession. He has every material possession that most of us could ever want. In other words, by any typical measure, Julian Mantle is “successful.”
However, as you’ll soon see, his workaholic life isn’t something that people should aspire to. The American Psychological Association (APA) reports that workaholism has negative impacts on physical and mental health—largely due to stress—as well as negative impacts on the workaholic’s relationships.
Are you wondering whether you might be a workaholic? Psychotherapist Ana Jovanovic offers 5 warning signs of workaholism, and some first steps you can take to adjust your relationship with your work.
By the time the story begins, Julian is losing his passion, his energy, and his focus. Instead of the brilliant legal arguments he built his career on, he often falls back on rambling, half-related stories and precedents. This is a sign that his mental health is declining along with his physical health.
One day, Julian has a heart attack and collapses mid-trial. While in the hospital, he decides that he no longer wants to practice law. After recovering, Julian sells off most of his material goods for a fraction of their value. He takes what little he has left and goes to India to look for guidance in his life.
(Shortform note: One of the major topics of The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari is finding balance in life. To help illustrate the point, it starts by showing the reader an unbalanced life. In other words, the first chapter of this book is a warning about what not to do.)
Julian is away for over three years, and he makes no contact with his old associates during that time.
While he’s gone, John gets older and more jaded. He develops a nasty temper and a habit of worrying about things he can’t change. In spite of that, he settles into a decent middle-class life; not as extravagant as Julian’s old life, but comfortable.
John’s great love in life is his children. He says that, after having kids, the way he viewed the world and his place in it changed—his secure, middle-class life wasn’t enough anymore. John began to search for meaning in his own life, but without much success.
John’s role in this book is to be a stand-in for the reader. John’s clearly unhappy, as evidenced from his anxiety and his short temper. He also seems to be looking for something in life, though he doesn’t know what; he just knows that he feels stressed and unfulfilled.
Those sentiments are common among people who are just starting to read about spirituality and meditation—they drive people to start their spiritual journeys in the first place.
Therefore, the lessons that John takes away from this—especially the ones that he comes up with himself or repeats back to Julian—are the lessons that Sharma hopes will stick with you the most.
One day Julian appears at John’s office without warning. He’s now fit, healthy, and happy, and looks decades younger than he did before his heart attack. The transformation is so extreme that John doesn’t recognize him at first.
Julian settles in and tells John that his heart attack had been a symptom of his broken spirit, the cause of which was his unbalanced lifestyle. His doctor had warned him that if he kept practicing law, the stress would soon kill him. Julian saw an opportunity to reinvent himself and find his passion again, which was why he left for India so suddenly.
John asks whether it was hard to give up everything and leave, to which Julian replies that it was the easiest thing he’d ever done. As Albert Camus said, “Real generosity toward the future requires giving all that you have to the present.” Julian took that quote literally, and gave up everything to seek his new life.
Julian begins to tell John about his travels.
The beginning of The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari gives us something of a “before and after” look at spirituality and meditation. We saw Julian before he began his spiritual journey—sick, exhausted, and miserable—and now we see him at the end of that journey, when he’s happy and healthy.
Sharma is saying: Here’s where you are now (past Julian); and here’s where you could be (present Julian). The rest of the book teaches you how to start making that change in your own life.
Julian had traveled through India seeking teachers and guidance. After seven months of wandering, Julian met a Yogi named Krishnan.
Krishnan was another former lawyer who got tired of the constant stress and overwork. Much like Julian, he gave up everything to seek new meaning in life. Eventually, Krishnan realized that his purpose is to serve others and make the world better. He was now the caretaker of a small local temple, where he had come to know himself and his place in the world.
Krishnan offered Julian this wisdom: Everything happens for a reason. Every setback is a lesson, and every failure is a chance to grow. Do not regret your past, but learn from it. Do not fear failure, but embrace it as a teacher. The only true failure is failing to try.
Remember that Julian’s perfectionism was what drove him to his unbalanced lifestyle in the first place. Therefore, this first lesson is exactly what Julian needs right now: By letting go of the fear of failure, he’ll be able to approach problems in a healthier and more balanced way.
This is also Sharma’s first lesson for the reader: Don’t regret the life you’ve lived up until this point, but also don’t be afraid to try new things.
Furthermore, don’t give up if you feel that you’ve failed at one of the lessons or practices in The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari. Instead, think about what that failure could teach you.
Thomas Griffin, president of OptinMonster, offers these four tips to maximize the value of your failures:
Humility: Nobody’s perfect—accepting that you’ll make mistakes and encounter failures will help to lessen the sting when it happens. As a result, you’ll be able to stay focused and motivated instead of getting discouraged.
Persistence: The most important part of learning from failure is not giving up. Instead, ask yourself why you failed, and how you can avoid that issue in the future. Most importantly, be honest about your mistakes so that you can learn from them.
Flexibility: After acknowledging why you failed, and determining how to avoid that problem in the future, you have to commit to changing your approach. In other words: You’ve decided what to do, but now you have to do it.
Filtering: This is about applying what you’ve learned from your failures. New ideas are exciting, and you’ll be tempted to immediately act on all of them. Instead, jot your ideas down in a notepad. Come back to those ideas later and, using the experience you’ve gained from previous failures, filter through your ideas to see which ones seem like they’ll do well going forward.
Krishnan suggested Julian look for the Sages of Sivana to continue his spiritual education. Krishnan explained that the Sages are a near-mythological group of monks who are supposed to have the keys to health, longevity, and happiness. They live high in the Himalayas, where it is dangerous for even experienced climbers to explore, and many people have died trying to find them. Despite the danger, Julian set out the next day to look for the Sages, somehow knowing he would be safe and would find what he was looking for.
(Shortform note: Julian’s physical journey echoes the reader’s spiritual journey in many ways. Much like someone just beginning to explore spirituality, Julian doesn’t know where he’s going or what he’s going to find along the way. Nonetheless, he sets out without fear, and with a sense that this experience is meant for him—just as you should do when exploring your spirituality.)
After a week traveling alone through the mountains, Julian found a Sage of Sivana. The man was at least as old as Julian, but his skin was perfectly smooth and he had the energy of someone half his age.
The Sage agreed to take Julian to Sivana and teach him, on one condition: Julian must take what he learns back home, and share it with as many people as possible. Julian gladly accepted.
(Shortform note: The monk tells Julian that it’s not enough to learn the secrets of inner peace and happiness—he must share those lessons with others. Julian will later tell John the same thing. Therefore, this is something that Sharma wants you to take to heart: Don’t just find happiness for yourself, help others to find it as well.)
The monk introduced himself as Yogi Raman and brought Julian to Sivana, a small village hidden in the mountains. The inhabitants all showed the same ageless health and vigor as Raman.
Julian observed that the people in Sivana went about their business purposefully, but calmly—not at all like his hectic lifestyle. Most remarkably of all, everyone there seemed to be perfectly happy.
Julian’s old life was a warning about how not to live, while Sivana is Sharma’s idealized lifestyle. You can compare your lifestyle to both Sivana and Julian’s old habits to get a sense of how healthy or unhealthy your current habits may be.
The next day, Julian began studying under Yogi Raman. Through study, meditation, and quiet observation of the world, Julian learned many of the Sages’ secrets. He learned to master his own thoughts, to take responsibility for his own health—physical, emotional, and spiritual—and how to avoid slipping back into his unbalanced lifestyle of overwork and unhealthy choices.
After only three weeks, Julian noticed the first signs of personal growth: He began seeing the beauty in simple things, like the night sky and a spider’s web. At around the same time, he began experiencing an inner peace he’d never felt before. Julian became happier, more energetic, and physically healthier each day he spent with the Sages.
(Shortform note: The fact that Julian noticed these changes in only three weeks is important, especially if you’re just starting to learn about or practice spirituality—it’s a promise that you, too, will start feeling better almost immediately. Therefore, instead of feeling overwhelmed by the idea of practicing these lessons for months or years, you can feel hopeful that you’ll start feeling better within weeks.)
Julian comes to John’s house the following evening, where they continue talking. However, at this point John begins to wonder whether it’s all a prank. He says the whole story is unbelievable.
In response, Julian picks up a teapot and pours it into John’s cup until it is full, then keeps pouring as it overflows. Julian says that, like the cup, John can’t take in any more until he empties himself.
An empty cup is a common metaphor for an open mind, especially in Eastern philosophy and martial arts circles. The quote, “empty your cup so that it may be filled...” is often attributed to Bruce Lee, but in fact, he was citing an ancient Chinese proverb.
Just like you can’t pour more tea into a cup that’s already full, your mind can’t take in new ideas until you let go of what you think you know. In other words, if you think you already understand a subject, you won’t be receptive to new ideas about it—especially if those ideas contradict what you already “know.”
We can see that John’s “cup” is full because he doubts Julian’s story. John’s judging the situation based on his own life experiences, which tell him that going to India and exploring the Himalayas alone would be very dangerous, and unlikely to lead to any sort of spiritual awakening. However, if John can’t learn to accept even the basic facts of Julian’s story, then he has no hope of learning the spiritual lessons that Julian wants to teach him. Therefore, John’s first step is to simply believe that Julian’s telling the truth.
Julian challenges John to study with him and apply his teachings just for one month. He promises that John will see huge improvements in his own life, and the lives of those around him.
Sharma reiterates that it only takes a few weeks to form new habits, and to feel the positive effects of those habits. This lesson also suggests that major life changes can begin with small steps.
Author Gretchen Rubin explores a similar concept of improving your life through small changes in her book The Happiness Project. However, while Sharma suggests working to improve all areas of your life at once, Rubin lays out a 12-month plan where each month is focused on a different aspect of self-improvement:
Increasing your energy
Improving your relationship with your significant other (if applicable)
Finding work you love
Becoming a better parent (if applicable)
Enjoying your leisure time
Strengthening your friendships
Meaningful spending; in other words, spending money in ways that make you happy, and avoiding spending it in ways that don’t make you happy
Cultivating gratitude in your day-to-day life
Pursuing your passion
Self-reflection
Improving your attitude
Doing all of the previous steps at once
The Sages’ beliefs are based on seven core virtues. Yogi Raman teaches these virtues to Julian through this short story:
You are sitting in the most peaceful, most magnificent garden you’ve ever seen. In the center of the garden is a red lighthouse, six stories tall. Suddenly, the door at the base of the lighthouse opens and a nine-foot-tall, 900-pound sumo wrestler stumbles out into the middle of the garden. He’s almost completely naked, except for a pink wire cable worn as underwear (we’ll return to this cable in Chapter 10).
The sumo wrestler finds a gold watch and picks it up. He puts on the watch and immediately falls to the ground, unconscious.
Suddenly, the sumo wrestler smells some nearby roses and wakes back up. He jumps to his feet with renewed vigor and looks to the left, and is startled by what he sees. There is a long path encrusted with diamonds stretching into the distance. The sumo wrestler walks along the path, and it leads him to eternal happiness.
Religions and other spiritual traditions often teach through stories like this one. Even the Bible, perhaps the most influential religious text in history, is commonly considered to be allegorical or metaphorical, rather than literal.
Instead of directly telling you what the lesson is, such traditions rely on imagery and metaphors to get the student thinking for him or herself. The student, guided by the teacher, must then explore the metaphors and find the lesson within them.
Because the student has to personally engage with the material, rather than memorizing lessons by rote, he’s more likely to remember that lesson and be able to apply it in various situations.
Though the story seems nonsensical at first, Sivana’s seven core virtues are represented by images within it.
(Shortform note: The rest of The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari is dedicated to explaining the seven metaphors from the garden parable.)
Julian’s old lifestyle and the Sages’ lifestyle illustrate two different extremes: The first is a life of stress, overindulgence, and materialism, while the second is a simple, balanced, and fulfilling lifestyle. Take a few minutes now to think about where you fall on the spectrum from Julian’s old life to the lives that the Sages of Sivana lead.
Think back on the past week. Name one thing that was a major source of stress for you.
What’s one unhealthy habit you’ve indulged?
Now think about the positives: What’s one thing that made you happy over the past week?
What’s a healthy choice that you made this week?
The garden from Yogi Raman’s story is a metaphor for your mind. Gardens must be properly cared for and cultivated in order to grow, and the same is true of minds.
However, many people’s mental gardens are contaminated with their fears and insecurities. Therefore, just as gardeners fiercely protect their gardens, you must stand guard over your mind and let only the right kinds of thoughts enter. In short, managing your mind is the key to managing your life.
Gardens are typically metaphors for paradise: beautiful places that are free from pain. The most famous example of this metaphor is the Garden of Eden, where Adam and Eve lived in perfect happiness before the fall of humanity.
However, while Eden was a garden that God created and maintained, Sharma makes it clear that you’re responsible for your own mental “garden.”
Thus, Sharma uses the garden metaphor to deliver two messages at once:
Your mind can be a paradise, but—
You have to work to make it one
(Shortform note: From this point onward, we’ll focus more on teaching lessons than on explicitly telling Julian’s story. For those sections when we return to the story, we’ll explicitly name one of the characters in the heading.)
According to Sharma, concentration is the core of mental mastery. You must be able to take all of your mind’s power and focus it on a single task.
Once you understand concentration, you are one step closer to finding happiness. The secret to happiness is to find what you love doing, then concentrate all of your energy on doing it. When you find what you really want to do, your work will seem like play, and it will energize you instead of draining you.
Sharma discusses the importance of passion, but he doesn’t offer much advice on how to learn what you’re passionate about. Minimalism, by Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus, explores that topic in more detail: They provide some exercises to help find your passion and identify some roadblocks that might be keeping you from pursuing it.
For example, you can start exploring your passions by answering these four questions:
What were five times when you felt really, truly excited?
Why were you excited at each of those times?
What experience left you excited for the longest time?
Is there a common thread between the experiences that you’ve listed?
Sharma maintains that that doesn’t mean you have to quit your job, sell everything you own, and go searching for your passion like Julian did—but try shaking things up. Leave your comfort zone and do something out of the ordinary. Stop being so practical and logical, and try some of the things you’ve always wanted to do.
Purpose and Focus Are Common Spiritual Themes
Julian teaches John that finding his purpose, and focusing his energy on that purpose, is crucial to living a happy and fulfilling life. Other philosophical traditions—some of which are quite different from the Buddhist-based teachings that Julian’s sharing with John—also emphasize the importance of purpose and focus. Thus, it’s clear that many different types of people thought those lessons were worth learning.
For example, purpose and focus are also two key elements of Stoicism, a philosophy that seems to be the polar opposite of Julian’s new philosophy. Whereas Julian says that John should let go of his rigid rationality, Stoicism argues that rationality is the most important thing in the world.
Stoicism teaches that emotions are distractions, so you must set aside your feelings and approach every situation with unclouded rationality. By doing so, you can devote every moment of your life to fulfilling your duty (whatever that duty might be)—in fact, Stoicism’s dispassionate workaholism resembles Julian’s old life more than his current one.
If you’re interested in Stoicism’s approach to finding your purpose and your focus, check out our guide to Marcus Aurelius’s Meditations.
While listening to Julian, John confesses that he has little control over his own thoughts these days. He’s stressed, and he feels like he’s constantly pulled by one task after another.
Julian agrees with John’s assessment, and he says that the mind is like a muscle: You have to exercise to make it stronger. He promises that a single month of dedicated effort will be enough for John to see huge changes in his life—just 10 minutes a day spent meditating on his current circumstances, how he’ll make the next day better, and his purpose in life is enough to start. Also, Julian mentions that the less John worries about results, the faster he’ll get them.
Julian repeats the one-month timeframe, and this time adds that John can start by taking small steps (like meditating for just 10 minutes each day).
Small steps leading to big outcomes is another lesson that you’ll see in many different schools of thought; therefore, it’s something that people with a wide variety of backgrounds and ways of thinking can all agree on.
In Minimalism, the authors repeatedly stress that making small improvements each day will lead to the happy, fulfilling life that you want.
The famous proverb “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step” comes from the Tao Te Ching, a core book of Taoism.
In Chapter 9, Sharma himself will discuss kaizen: the practice of making daily, incremental improvements. Kaizen originated in Japanese business after World War II, most notably Toyota.
John asks for practical techniques that he can use, so Julian teaches him a meditation technique called the Heart of the Rose. You can do this exercise yourself, with nothing but a rose and a quiet space.
Take your rose and stare at the center of the flower. Think of nothing but the rose. Notice its color, shape, scent, and even its texture.
Other thoughts will intrude at first. Accept them, and return your attention to the rose. With practice, those intrusive thoughts will come less frequently, and eventually stop completely as you strengthen your mind and your focus.
The Heart of the Rose is Sharma’s take on the classic candle meditation.
In a candle meditation, you light a candle and stare at it. While doing this, you focus completely on the candle’s flame; any thoughts that aren’t related to observing the candle should be acknowledged, and then immediately dismissed. Over time, you should find that fewer and fewer thoughts intrude on your meditation.
Whether you’re looking at a flower or a candle flame, the purpose is to practice focusing on a single thing while shutting out unrelated thoughts.
A second powerful technique Julian teaches John is Opposition Thinking: Whenever a negative thought occupies your mind, dismiss that thought and replace it with a positive one. It’s a simple exercise, but it requires persistence and vigilance to be effective. Try not to let even a single negative thought take root in your mind.
Opposition Thinking Application: Multitasking vs. Flow
Opposition Thinking works because the human mind can only focus on one thing at a time—studies show that multitasking is a myth. Opposition Thinking takes advantage of that fact by intentionally focusing your attention on positive thoughts, rather than negative ones.
If you’d like more detail on how to practice Opposition Thinking, note that it’s a simplified version of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT). CBT is a process where you learn to recognize and examine irrational negative thoughts (for example: “I failed that test, so I’m stupid and worthless”) and to replace them with more positive, realistic thoughts (like, “One test doesn’t define my life; I’ll do better next time”).
With CBT, you examine your thoughts using questions like:
What evidence is there that this thought is true? What evidence is there that it’s false?
How else could I think about this situation?
If a friend had this thought, what would I say to him or her?
Opposition Thinking is a more streamlined process; you simply recognize the negative thought and dismiss it by thinking of something else, effectively skipping all of the in-between steps of CBT. However, if you find that you’re truly struggling to control your negative thoughts, you may find it useful to go through the full process of CBT—with professional help, if necessary.
Find a quiet place, close your eyes, and simply breathe until you feel calm and your mind is clear. Then visualize, as clearly as you can, the person you want to be. For example, if you want to be happy, see yourself laughing and smiling. If you want to be brave, see yourself acting boldly at a decisive moment.
This exercise is grounded in the idea that your mind attracts what you think about. Therefore, if there is a lack in your life, it’s because there is a lack in your thoughts. This exercise is designed to make sure that you’re attracting the right things.
While teaching Julian, Yogi Raman called this phenomenon of attracting what you think about joriki, which means “concentrated mind.”
Joriki and the Law of Attraction
Joriki is a concept in Zen Buddhism. It describes the ability to act instantly and correctly, apparently without thought, when your mind is fully focused on a single objective or idea.
Sharma is merging joriki with the Law of Attraction: the idea that positive thoughts attract positive experiences. The Law of Attraction came from the New Thought movement of the late 19th century; more recently, Rhonda Byrne repopularized the idea with her 2006 movie The Secret, and the book of the same name, published in 2007.
In combining the concepts of joriki and the Law of Attraction, Sharma is saying that by focusing your mind entirely on one specific thing that you want, you’ll attract that thing into your life.
However, others argue that you don’t “attract” the things you think about—you simply start to notice them. For example, in his book Limitless, Jim Kwik talks about setting your brain to look for relevant information by asking a dominant question. Kwik says that whatever you’re looking for has always been there, but dominant questions prepare your mind to notice it. Some readers may also recognize this principle by its more scientific name, the Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon.).
So far we’ve discussed focus, but, according to Sharma, in order to properly maintain the garden of your mind, you must also develop clarity. Clarity of thought means that you see and understand your experiences for what they are, rather than getting distracted by your feelings about them.
You can start developing clarity by recognizing that there’s no such thing as objective reality. For example, one person’s favorite food might be disgusting—or even dangerous—to someone else. Similarly, what seems like a tragedy could actually be a great opportunity, like Julian’s heart attack.
Therefore, Sharma argues that it’s important to stay focused on your experiences themselves, rather than your judgments of those experiences. Any judgments you make will inevitably be flawed, because there’s no objective truth to base those judgments on. Therefore, don’t think of your experiences as “good” or “bad;” just live them, and accept what they have to teach you.
Sharma believes this lesson applies even to the most mundane experiences. For example, if you try a new food and don’t enjoy the taste, now you know that you don’t like that food. Thus, your experience has taught you something. However, there’s no sense in dwelling on how bad it tasted; simply accept the lesson and move on.
Various Schools of Thought on Accepting Your Experiences
Many different philosophical traditions, including several that we’ve already discussed, teach that you shouldn't try to judge your moment-to-moment experiences as good or bad. Instead, you should simply accept the present moment for what it is.
The reasons they give for that conclusion vary:
Stoicism (e.g. Meditations) says that your experiences are what the gods and Nature have decreed for you. Since a human can’t hope to resist the will of the gods, it’s better to just accept whatever happens.
Hinduism (e.g. the Bhagavad Gita) says that everything we perceive and experience is illusory, and that God is the only true reality. Since our experiences are unreal and temporary, we mustn’t let ourselves be affected by them.
Buddhism teaches that we should welcome our experiences, but not let them rule us. In other words, our experiences don’t affect our thoughts or our actions. Tara Brach explores this topic from a Buddhist perspective in her book Radical Acceptance.
Less religious schools of thought might talk about the benefits of “living in the moment,” or similar phrases; that is, being fully present instead of lost in thought. For example, Eckhart Tolle’s book The Power of Now teaches that being fully present in each moment is the only way to find happiness, peace, and fulfillment in your life.
Whatever the given reasons, it’s clear that a wide variety of philosophies value accepting your experiences for what they are, instead of trying to judge or control them.
All of these exercises begin with clearing your mind. The Heart of the Rose is a simple mind-clearing exercise that anyone can do.
Find a nearby object—it doesn’t matter what—and pick it up. Take five minutes to sit quietly and concentrate on that object. Observe everything about it: shape, color, texture, even scent. Don’t try to fight against intruding thoughts. Instead, acknowledge and then dismiss them. At the end of the five minutes, write down how you feel.
How often did you find your thoughts drifting from your chosen object?
What sorts of thoughts commonly distracted you?
Next time you practice the Heart of the Rose, what will you do when intruding thoughts break your focus?
In this section we discuss the lighthouse from Raman’s fable, which represents purpose. As we said in the last chapter, a purpose in life is one of the keys to happiness: Like a lighthouse guides ships through dangerous waters, your purpose guides you through your life.
(Shortform note: Light (and, by extension, a lighthouse) is a common symbol in religious texts as well as literary ones. Christianity in particular frequently refers to Jesus as a guiding light, and the purpose of Christianity is to serve Jesus. Regardless of your own religious leanings (or lack of them), this example shows how a clear purpose can guide you through life.)
In Limitless, Jim Kwik talks about dominant questions: questions that you ask yourself so that you’ll focus on relevant information. Your purpose is like a dominant question for your entire life.
For example, if you’re looking to buy a new car, your dominant question might be, “What’s the best car for me?” With that question in mind, your brain will naturally search for information about cars that meet your needs—price, reliability, and so on—as you go about your day. Therefore, if you happen to see an advertisement for a car dealership, you’ll take note of that advertisement instead of dismissing it as background noise.
In the same way, suppose that you’re a doctor whose purpose is to treat sick patients—as you go through each day, you’ll subconsciously search for information that’s relevant to that goal: information about newly discovered diseases, promising new treatments, and so on.
However, at this point your dominant question might simply be, “What is my purpose?” This chapter seeks to help you answer that question.
The concept of dharma, which roughly means “purpose,” teaches that everyone has a mission on Earth, and unique skills and gifts to help complete that mission. According to Sharma, living by your dharma is the only way to achieve true happiness; therefore, in order to live happily and contentedly, you must first discover what your purpose is.
The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari translates dharma as “purpose,” which is accurate but doesn’t convey the full scope of the word.
Dharma has a much deeper and more religious meaning than just one’s purpose in life; it’s both the laws of the universe as set down by the gods, and it’s what each individual person is meant to do as a result of those laws.
The Bhagavad Gita explores this topic in greater depth.
Sharma teaches that the first step toward finding your dharma is setting clear and specific goals.
Do this right now: Take a piece of paper and write down some specific long-term goals. Write whatever comes to mind in the moment—you can always reevaluate your list later.
Having a list of goals will help sort through the clutter of your daily thoughts, so that you can focus your attention and energy on what’s important to you.
In Eat That Frog, Brian Tracy’s book about achieving difficult goals, the first chapter discusses the importance of knowing what those goals are. Tracy, like Sharma, writes that having specific goals will focus your energy and motivate you to achieve them—and the more ambitious your goals are, the more motivated you’ll be.
John reminisces about how he used to lose track of time while painting. He compares the feeling to being in heaven. Julian tells him that feeling is the result of focusing his energy on something that he loves. He suggests that John’s dharma may be to make beautiful paintings for others to enjoy.
Dharma Leads to Flow; Flow Leads to Nirvana
Flow, by psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, is a deep dive into the kind of experience that John’s remembering. Csikszentmihalyi describes flow as an “optimal experience” where you’re completely focused and completely happy—you’re not losing any mental energy to intrusive thoughts or unhelpful feelings.
Nirvana is a state of endless, perfect happiness, which Sharma touches on briefly in The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari. In a religious context, Nirvana is roughly equivalent to heaven; thus, John’s comment that painting was like “being in heaven” shows the link between dharma and Nirvana.
- Nirvana is the end goal of Buddhism and Hinduism, where it’s defined as a perfect union between your spirit and god (or the universe). The Bhagavad Gita offers details on this more religious interpretation of the concept.
In a more secular context, you could consider Nirvana to be a state of perpetual flow—thus, according to Sharma, living by your dharma is a crucial part of reaching Nirvana.
Sharma and Csikszentmihalyi offer two different approaches to reaching this state of perfect focus and happiness:
Sharma says that you can be happy at all times by finding your dharma, and devoting all of your energy to fulfilling it. According to Sharma, any time that you’re working toward your dharma, you’ll be in a flow state (though he doesn’t use the word “flow” to describe it).
Csikszentmihalyi says you can find flow in any situation by setting challenges for yourself. These challenges should be difficult, but achievable.
- For example, if you want to improve your basketball skills, perhaps you’d practice three-point shots. You’ll experience flow as long as those shots are difficult (but not impossible) for you to make. If making those shots becomes too easy, you’ll exit the flow state, and that’s how you’ll know that it’s time to set a new challenge.
John now questions whether his goals can be smaller and more practical, such as losing weight. Julian replies that there’s nothing wrong with setting a lot of small goals on the way to larger objectives; in fact, small steps are the best way to get started on major life changes.
Small goals lead to small victories, which are crucial for maintaining your enthusiasm as you work on a large project like finding your dharma.
Our Iceberg Is Melting is another parable about making major changes. According to that book, one of the key steps in a major project is to achieve and celebrate small victories, just like Julian described in the previous section.
The Sages had a five-step process for achieving their goals:
1. Clearly visualize the goal. Take a moment each day, perhaps right after you wake up, to imagine yourself as you’ll be once you reach your goal.
(Shortform note: In Can’t Hurt Me, former Navy SEAL David Goggins describes how visualizing his goals helped him through the worst parts of SEAL training. His mental image of success helped him to push through pain and exhaustion while he worked to turn that image into reality.)
2. Create positive pressure for yourself. This does not mean to badger or berate yourself—that would be negative pressure—but to somehow add some stakes to your goal that encourage you to pursue it.
In his self-help book Awaken the Giant Within, Tony Robbins talks about eustress: positive pressure that improves performance (as opposed to distress, which is negative pressure that hinders performance).
In Chapter 9, Robbins talks about how to create eustress for yourself. Two key suggestions are:
Recognize that you’re not satisfied with your current situation, thereby motivating yourself to change it.
Share your new goal with friends who will encourage you to pursue it (the same advice that Sharma gives in this section).
3. Create a clear and specific timeline for your goal. Deadlines will help keep you on track throughout the process.
(Shortform note: Deadlines are another type of positive pressure. Deadlines motivate you to finish your tasks; and the closer a task’s deadline gets, the more motivated you’ll be.)
4. Choose a specific action or behavior that will help reach your goal, and do it every day for 21 days. This is how long it takes for new habits to be formed, and bad habits to be replaced.
(Shortform note: Although Sharma and other self-help experts frequently say that it takes 21 days to form a healthy new habit, in reality it might take much longer—one study showed that it took an average of 66 days (and in some cases as long as 254 days) for a new behavior to become a habit.)
5. Enjoy the process. Have fun while pursuing your goals; if your new ritual feels like a chore then you won’t stick to it.
(Shortform note: James Clear’s self-help book Atomic Habits offers some more advice on finding the fun within your new habit. For example, if your new habit is daily exercise, you might find that going for a run with your dog is more fun than walking on the treadmill at the gym.)
Sharma suggests that one way to find your dharma is to keep a Dream Book. Buy a cheap notebook, and fill it with goals and dreams from all areas of your life. Divide your Dream Book into sections based on what type of goal you’re adding: fitness, financial, relationship, spiritual, and so on.
Also include pictures that represent your goals, and people who have achieved those goals already. For example, if your goal is to get in better shape, perhaps include a picture of a superstar athlete.
A Dream Book can help not only with tracking your goals, but also with discovering where your passions lie. As you look through your notebook, you can ask yourself questions like:
What areas of my life are most of my goals focused on?
Which goals am I most excited to pursue?
Which accomplishments came easily to me, and which ones did I struggle with?
These are only examples; any questions that guide you to a better understanding of yourself will help you find your purpose.
It’s time to begin searching for your own Dharma, and the first step is to set goals. Remember that enjoying the process is crucial—you won’t reach your destination if every step feels like a chore.
Write down a single, specific goal for yourself, and a reasonable timeframe to achieve it. The goal could be from any part of your life, but should represent an improvement that you want to make.
Close your eyes and picture yourself achieving that goal. What do you see?
What kind of stakes can you add to the goal to encourage yourself to pursue it? For example, could you tell some friends about your new goal, or promise yourself a reward if you reach it?
What can you do today to get closer to that goal?
What can you do tomorrow, and every day from then on, to get closer to that goal?
The sumo wrestler from Yogi Raman’s story represents kaizen: a Japanese word that can be translated as continuous self-improvement. Practicing kaizen includes boosting your discipline, confidence, health, and optimism.
(Shortform note: The word kaizen usually refers to improving a company, rather than a person. For example, Toyota is known for its company culture of kaizen. However, whether it’s applied to a multinational corporation or an individual, the principle is the same: improving a little bit every day.)
To understand this metaphor, remember that sumo wrestlers are athletes, even though they don’t have the trim and toned builds that Western cultures typically associate with athleticism.
Athletes commonly represent human perfection—ideals that people should aspire to. However, in this fable, Sharma is more concerned with how athletes become perfect: through constant training and improvement. Thus, the ideal that Sharma wants you to aspire to is endless self-improvement.
Kaizen means trying to be a little better each day than you were the day before. While it usually refers to a business practice, Sharma wants you to apply that same principle to yourself.
John sees potential areas of self-improvement almost immediately:
These are three key areas John can focus on while he practices kaizen.
(Shortform note: As we’ve said before, John normally acts as a stand-in for the reader; this section is one of the few places where John offers specific, concrete ideas of his own. Therefore, it’s safe to assume that the three categories he mentions are key points that the author hopes you’ll remember from the lessons so far. They’ll also be excellent areas to focus on as you practice kaizen for yourself.)
According to Sharma, you can practice kaizen by constantly pushing yourself beyond where you think your limits are. First, identify what’s holding you back: Your limitations could come from fear, weakness, lack of energy, or something else. Make a list of your weaknesses, then face each one head-on.
Personal trainers and martial artists often say that the exercises you hate are the ones you need the most. You hate those exercises because they target your weaknesses—but that’s exactly why they’ll help you. The same holds true for kaizen: The things that you least want to work on are exactly what you need to work on.
For example, if you’re terrified of being in front of an audience, see if you can get into a community theater production. It won’t be comfortable, but it will also help you overcome your fear of being the center of attention.
Sharma argues that ten simple rituals can help ensure that you’re constantly improving yourself. The rituals can take as little as an hour each day to complete, but they must be performed every single day. Furthermore, these rituals work best if you practice each one at the same time every day.
(Shortform note: Rituals exist in everything from grand religious ceremonies to daily life—for example, knocking on wood to ward off bad luck is a type of ritual. Studies suggest that rituals are so common because they work. Rituals give you a feeling of power and control; in this case, power over yourself and control over your life.)
Take 15-50 minutes every day to simply sit alone, in silence. Do this someplace that you find beautiful, because beauty soothes the mind. The space can be as simple as a spare room, or even a corner of a room that you decorate to your liking.
(Shortform note: Psychotherapist Amy Morin describes several benefits of spending time alone. These benefits include increased empathy, creativity, and productivity.)
Mental health and physical health are intrinsically linked—if you feel unhealthy and lethargic, or if you’re in pain, it’ll be hard for you to muster the energy and concentration for kaizen. Therefore, you should seek to improve your body as well as your mind.
Exercising for five hours per week is enough to start practicing this ritual. Make sure to pick an activity that you enjoy—you’re more likely to stick to your rituals if you have fun with them.
This article from Dispatch Health describes the link between mental and physical health in more detail.
For example, mental health conditions like anxiety and depression can seriously harm your physical health, both because they put a lot of strain on your body and because they make it harder to take proper care of yourself. Conversely, regular exercise can help reduce the symptoms of those conditions.
To strengthen your body and restore your energy, eat a diet of “live foods.” In other words: fresh fruits, vegetables, and grains. Avoid meat and processed foods—you don’t have to give them up entirely, but try making such things occasional treats instead of the centerpiece of every meal.
Studies show that heavily processed foods like cookies, frozen dinners, and premade sauces carry a number of health risks. Such things tend to be loaded with extra salt, fat, and sugar, while their natural nutrients get lost in the processing. The result is highly fattening food that we digest too quickly, leaving us hungry for more. Furthermore, some studies have shown that heavily processed foods increase the risk of cancer.
To clarify: These concerns don’t apply to things like bagged salad or canned vegetables (although those are technically “processed”).
When in doubt, check the ingredients—a long list of additives could be a red flag.
Read for 30 minutes every day. Choose what you read carefully—remember to only let the right thoughts into the garden of your mind. Historical novels, inspirational biographies, and educational books about topics that interest you are all excellent choices.
Furthermore, don’t just read the books; study them. Think deeply about what you’re reading and how it applies to you.
In How to Read a Book, Mortimer J. Adler discusses how to increase your reading comprehension and retention by asking yourself four key questions while you read:
What is the main idea of this book?
What is the author giving the most details about (in other words, what topics does the author think are most important)?
Is what’s written in this book true?
Why is this book important?
Take some time every evening to think about your day. Consider your thoughts and actions, and whether they were productive or harmful.
At first it may be hard to remember your thoughts from the day, but with practice you’ll find that your memory gets clearer. You might also find it helpful to keep a journal of the significant events that happen each day.
This ritual will quickly and clearly show you what you’re already doing well, and which areas of your life need improvement.
Sharma suggests keeping a journal to help remember what you did each day. As it turns out, journaling may have more benefits than just as a memory aid.
The American Psychological Association (APA) notes that journaling is often an important part of trauma therapy: It helps patients come to terms with their experiences, and manage their responses to those experiences.
More recently, researchers have noticed that keeping a journal of your feelings can improve your health as well. The current hypothesis is that journaling relieves emotional stress, which boosts your physical health—remember the connection between mental health and physical health, which we discussed in the Second Ritual.
Get up each day at dawn, or at least earlier than you’re used to. Most people sleep more than they need to, and can function perfectly well on six hours of sleep a night.
(Shortform note: Most modern research suggests that adults should get anywhere from 7-9 hours of sleep per night, depending on personal needs. To learn more about this research, read our summary of Why We Sleep.)
After rising early, use the extra time for something that will put you into a positive, constructive mind frame. For example, try going for a walk in nature, watching the sunrise, listening to your favorite music, or meditating on the good things in your life.
If you tend to go to bed late and wake up late, then shifting your schedule to rise with the sun like Sharma suggests may seem difficult. A New York Times article titled A (Former) Night Owl’s Guide to Becoming a Morning Person offers some suggestions for how you can get to bed earlier, and feel more awake in the morning. A couple of examples are:
Start to relax 1-2 hours before bed. Avoid heavy meals, exercise, and TV or computer screens during this time.
Give yourself something to look forward to in the morning. This could be something as simple as spending some time listening to music, or making a nice breakfast; just make sure that you’ve got a reason to get out of bed.
This ritual is an abbreviated version of what Sharma writes about in an earlier book of his, The 5AM Club.
Spend some time every day listening to music that you enjoy, even if it’s just in the car on the way to work. Also, try using music to rest and recover when you’re feeling drained.
(Shortform note: Music isn’t just enjoyable—studies have shown that listening to music has mental, emotional, and even physical benefits. It relieves stress, improves your mood, and boosts your concentration.)
Find a mantra or two that is meaningful to you. A mantra is a simple phrase that can be repeated a great number of times. Doing so focuses your mind and influences your self-image based on that phrase.
For example, to motivate himself, Julian might say that he is inspired, excited, and disciplined. He’d repeat this mantra out loud 200-300 times—but, if you don’t want to speak it aloud, written mantras are just as effective.
A group of doctors in Ireland performed a systematic review of studies that claimed to show the effectiveness of mantras and meditation. They concluded that mantras may offer “minimal to moderate” mental health benefits.
However, the doctors also noted that most of the studies they reviewed were of low quality. Therefore, while evidence does seem to indicate that mantras are an effective way to focus your mind and improve your mental health, the scientific community still considers those conclusions to be dubious.
Take some time every day to meditate on the following values:
Try to ensure that every action you take is congruent with—which is to say, in agreement with—at least one of these virtues.
If you find it difficult to meditate on vague concepts like Compassion or Humility, it might help to instead meditate on people whom you admire, and try to make your character congruent with their characters instead.
One Twitter user offers a humorous—but effective—example of how to use that strategy, which he calls the Two Rogers Rule. He thinks about Steve Rogers (AKA Captain America) and Fred Rogers (of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood), and he doesn’t do anything unless at least one of them would approve of it.
Can you think of people who embody each of the values in this ritual, the way the Rogerses embody healthy masculinity for this user? How might you emulate those people?
Focus on living a simple, uncluttered life. Find your goals and your priorities and work toward them, without wasting energy on unimportant things.
Many different practices encourage you to live a minimalist life; to devote your attention to your health and your goals, rather than to material goods. When you find the same lesson in so many different schools of thought, you know that a lot of different kinds of people thought that it was important.
Here are just a few quotes from different spiritual traditions:
From the Bible (NIV), 1 Thessalonians 4:11: “and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you...”
From the Dalai Lama, spiritual leader of Tibet: “We have a largely materialistic lifestyle characterized by a materialistic culture. However, this only provides us with temporary, sensory satisfaction, whereas long-term satisfaction is based not on the senses but on the mind. That’s where real tranquility is to be found.”
From the Tao Te Ching: “Manifest plainness, embrace simplicity, put others first, desire little.”
In Minimalism, Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus discuss how they found happiness by rejecting consumerism and embracing simplicity and self-reflection instead. Their new minimalist lifestyle focused on five values:
Good health
Their relationships with others
Pursuing their passions (Sharma would say their purpose, or their dharma)
Constant personal growth (what Sharma calls kaizen)
Helping others (this is also one of Sharma’s key values: remember the roses metaphor).
Sharma says you don’t have to start all 10 rituals right away. Moderation is key in all things, and that includes kaizen; if you overwhelm yourself with too many changes all at once, you’re more likely to give up.
The Ten Rituals for Health and Happiness might seem like a lot to take in all at once, and practicing them all may seem impossible. This is an excellent time to consider what might work for you, specifically.
Adopting just one or two of these rituals would be a great start, and you can always add others to your routine later on. If you find your chosen rituals helpful, then keep practicing them; if not, you’re free to stop at any time.
Finally, you might find that you already practice some of these rituals. For example, reading and exercising are common hobbies, so you might have been performing the ritual of reading or the ritual of exercising without even realizing it.
Choose one of the 10 Rituals for Health and Happiness. Pick the one that speaks most to you at this moment.
Which Ritual did you choose, and why?
How could you practice this ritual today?
Do you plan to continue performing this ritual? If so, how? If not, why?
We now return to Yogi Raman’s fable of the garden and the next metaphor. The sumo wrestler’s pink wire cable represents discipline.
Wire cables are made of many thin wires wrapped around each other. Together, these weak wires become very strong. Discipline is like a wire cable: Many small actions and habits reinforce each other to create immense inner strength.
Sharma argues that you need discipline and willpower to keep your commitments and build your character. They’re what will enable you to perform the Ten Rituals every day, and they’ll give you the mental fortitude to handle life’s everyday challenges and unexpected problems.
(Shortform note: You might already have some of the wires that will eventually form your cable. If you’ve started practicing some of the Rituals for Health and Happiness, or if you have other habits that keep you fit and focused, then you’ve already begun building your wire cable of discipline!)
Sharma believes anyone can build discipline and willpower relatively quickly. Even simple chores like making your bed and doing the dishes are effective exercises to build discipline.
Small victories like doing your chores every day will form the building blocks of larger, life-altering victories like letting go of fear. In other words, making small changes will give you the momentum and motivation to make larger changes.
At first, Sharma says, you’ll be tempted to fall back into your old habits. Beware of thoughts that urge you toward laziness or procrastination. Keep pushing yourself (remember kaizen) and you’ll keep improving; those lazy thoughts will intrude less often and less powerfully.
Sharma essentially suggests that you build up your willpower through brute force: Just power through whatever fatigue or stress is making it difficult to do your work, and eventually you’ll get stronger, as if you were lifting mental weights.
Sharma’s method works to build good habits, and to move past the mental roadblock of waiting to do your work until you “feel like it.” However, it may also be helpful to understand why you often don’t “feel like it.”
Kelly McGonigal’s book The Willpower Instinct offers several possible explanations, any or all of which may apply to you. McGonigal examines the connections between willpower and your physical health, your mental health, and even how you’re feeling that day. She also suggests ways to bolster your willpower:
Meditation. Like Sharma, McGonigal suggests meditation as a way to train your mind and gain better control of your thoughts—in this case, better control over the thoughts that tell you to be lazy, or put off doing your work.
Exercise. Your physical health has an impact on your energy, and therefore your willpower. Exercise also helps to relieve stress.
Get more or better sleep. Fatigue drains willpower—if you’re fighting just to stay awake, then you’ll have much less energy to stay focused and productive.
Rest and breathe. When you need a quick boost, McGonigal suggests that you simply lie down and focus on your breathing. Ten minutes of relaxation and deep, slow breathing will help you re-energize and refocus.
To get John started on building discipline, Julian suggests a mantra for John and tells him to repeat it at least 30 times a day. The mantra reminds John that he’s more than he seems to be; that he has all the power of the universe inside him. This mantra will help him tap into reserves of willpower he doesn’t know he has.
Here we see Julian giving John the first wire of his cable: a mantra, as described in the Eighth Ritual for Health and Happiness. John’s mantra is designed to remind him that he has the strength and willpower to accomplish anything he wants to do.
In fact, this mantra will help build John’s discipline in two different ways:
Performing the Eighth Ritual every day will exercise John’s willpower
The mantra will reinforce John’s belief in his own inner strength
The watch from Yogi Raman’s story symbolizes time. Specifically, it represents the understanding that your time is limited and precious.
Sharma maintains that those who use their limited time wisely and productively will lead rich, full lives.
Clocks are a symbol of time, for obvious reasons. Specifically, they’re often a metaphor for limited time—Sharma is saying that your life is finite, and therefore so is the time that you have to work with.
When the sumo wrestler from the fable picks up the stopwatch, he immediately faints; he’s overwhelmed by the realization that his time is limited. The way to avoid the overwhelm that he experienced is to make the most of what time you have, and live a life that you’ll be satisfied with (as you’ll see with the next metaphor, the roses).
John mentions that he once heard the busiest people are the ones with time to spare. Julian agrees, saying that the most productive people aren’t the workaholics, but the ones who manage their time well.
Julian offers three strategies to manage your time more effectively:
People say that 80 percent of what you achieve comes from 20 percent of what you do. Think about all the things you do in a day, then think about which of those things will have a lasting impact on your life. Most likely you’ll only come up with a few things that actually matter in the long run.
Important activities might include:
These are only examples. Sharma emphasizes that you need to find what will be important to you in the long run, and devote your time and energy to those things.
The 80/20 Rule and the Size Instinct
In Factfulness, Hans Rosling explains that the 80/20 Rule (also known as the Pareto Principle) applies to everything from causes of death to items in a budget—20% of the items in each dataset cause 80% of the results in that dataset. One scientific study even suggests that the 80/20 Rule might be a result of the natural law of entropy.
Rosling also says that we recognize the 80/20 Rule when we overcome the size instinct. The size instinct is the human tendency to overestimate how important a single fact or piece of data is when it’s presented without context.
For example, if someone told you that Amazon’s stock price had dropped by nearly $15 yesterday, that would sound like an enormous amount of money to lose in a day. However, if they then told you that was only 0.45% of the stock’s value, you’d recognize that drop for the minor fluctuation that it really is.
Therefore, when you examine your own day-to-day life, look for the few things you do that have the greatest impact—and don’t get distracted by contextless events. For example, if you made an extra $50 one day from selling something on eBay, consider the time you spent and the money you made in the context of your entire day, and your entire income. How much of a difference did that sale really make, and how much time did it cost you?
Sharma suggests that, rather than spend a stressful day scrambling to catch up on all the things you have to do, you take 15 minutes the night before to plan your next day—or, better yet, take an hour on your day off to plan your week.
Figure out what you have to do professionally, personally, socially, and spiritually, and allot time for all of your daily tasks. Write down your schedule, and then stick to it.
Procrastination is human nature, so you’ll naturally want to avoid or put off unpleasant tasks. However, remember that the happiest people are the ones who will accept short-term discomfort for long-term benefits.
Also, Sharma warns, be wary of people who try to steal your time. Protect your time ruthlessly. Don’t be afraid to tell people no when they try to intrude on time you’ve allotted for something else.
The 12 Week Year suggests making the most of your time through “time blocking,” which means creating solid stretches of time where you focus on only one thing (remember the myth of multitasking). However, in order for this to be effective, you have to add three time blocks to your usual weekly schedule:
Strategic block. This is a three-hour stretch of time where you focus 100% on whatever will bring you closer to your goal. One hundred percent focus means that you don’t take phone calls, check emails or text messages, or get distracted by other tasks during that entire three-hour block.
- According to The 12 Week Year, you can maintain perfect focus for about three hours each week. The strategic block is designed to make the most of those three hours by planning out when you’ll use them, and what you’ll use them for.
Buffer block. This is a pre-set time block where you take care of all the things that would normally distract you throughout your work day. This is a time to answer emails, make phone calls, check travel arrangements, or handle whatever else might be weighing on your mind.
Breakout block. This is time that you commit to resting, relaxing, and having fun. Success-driven people tend to overlook this block in favor of scheduling more time to work, but it’s important to give yourself time to recover as well.
- Remember Julian’s life at the beginning of The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari. Julian never scheduled any breakout blocks, so he was constantly stressed and exhausted—issues that culminated in his heart attack.
We’ve previously discussed how failure is an excellent teacher. However, to make the most of your time, Sharma says you should act as if failure doesn’t even exist. Dwelling on past mistakes or worrying about future ones is a waste of your precious time.
Don’t set limits on yourself; let your imagination go where it will. Have no doubt in your mind that you’ll achieve all of your goals: professional, personal, and spiritual. Most of all, don’t be ashamed of your past, or afraid of your future.
Prioritizing and planning are obvious ways to make better use of your time, but this third subsection might seem out of place at first glance. What this section’s really saying is that it’s better to take a chance than to try to eliminate any chance that you’ll make a mistake.
In Daring Greatly, Brené Brown discusses how we hold ourselves back through shame and fear—we’re afraid to be vulnerable, and we try to avoid shame by never making mistakes. Therefore, we never take chances in our relationships, our careers, or any other aspect of our lives.
To find the courage to act as though failure doesn’t exist, Brown offers these solutions:
Counteract shame with awareness and connection. Whenever you feel shame, identify what triggered it. Then, try to determine whether that shame is rooted in something reasonable, or in impossible expectations and perfectionism. Once you understand your shame and where it came from, reach out to someone you trust and discuss the experience; this is an important step toward overcoming shame and developing feelings of worthiness and belonging.
Counteract fear with self-compassion. Rather than trying to avoid ever making mistakes, or berating yourself for your imperfections, recognize that you’re doing your best and that it’s enough.
The roses that awaken the sumo wrestler in Raman’s fable represent service to others. They reference an old Chinese proverb, which says that a bit of perfume will stay on the hand that gives away a rose. In other words, by being kind to others you’ll improve your own life as well.
Sharma argues that quality of life doesn’t come from a big home or a fast car. You had nothing when you were born, and—no matter how rich you become—you’ll have nothing after you die. Therefore, working only for yourself is pointless. Rather, true quality of life comes from what you give back to the world, and the real reason you exist is to serve others.
You’re born crying while the world celebrates; you should die celebrating while the world cries. In other words, live a life that you’ll be happy with, and that others will be sad to lose.
Sharma cites an old Chinese proverb that a sweet scent lingers on a hand that gives away a rose. In other words, when you do good deeds for others (like giving them flowers), you also benefit personally (the scent stays on your hand).
The sumo wrestler from the fable—who fainted when he realized that his time was limited—smells some nearby flowers and immediately wakes up, showing even more energy and vigor than he had before. This is because he now knows what to do with his limited time: help others. He’s energetic because he’s happy with his new purpose, and excited to get started on it.
Thus, Sharma’s saying that you can live a happy and fulfilling life by devoting yourself to doing good deeds for others.
Sharma maintains that you don’t have to give up your job or your possessions like Julian; however, you should see yourself as part of the world, not just as an individual living in it.
Therefore, take some time each day to think about the good you can do for others. These can be very small things, like letting a car pass you during a traffic jam, or giving a compliment to someone who isn’t expecting it. Sharma says those small gestures will add up to increased happiness for yourself and those around you.
One of the best ways to do this is to help your friends and keep your relationships strong. Your friends, in turn, will enrich your own life. Friends make your good times better and your bad times more bearable.
It would be impossible to tell you exactly how to help the people in your life. Everyone has different needs, and different talents to help meet those needs.
That’s why this chapter emphasizes relationships, rather than specific actions—by maintaining your friendships, doing kind gestures for one another, and practicing open, honest communication, you’ll come to understand the best ways to help each other.
In chapter 4 of How Will You Measure Your Life? Clayton Christensen applies financial theory to relationships with two main points:
Some people over-invest time and energy in their careers, and under-invest in their relationships. This imbalance leaves them (and their friends and family) feeling unhappy and unfulfilled.
It’s important to invest your time and energy into relationships that will experience long-term growth, rather than short-term payouts. For example, finding a loving spouse will net you a much better “return” than a one-night stand.
Sharma isn’t using financial terminology, but he’s suggesting the same thing: Working to develop your relationships with others will enrich your own life.
The last metaphor from Yogi Raman’s fable is the path of diamonds, which represents living in the moment: fully experiencing and enjoying each moment as it comes and goes. According to the parable of the garden, the diamond path leads to happiness.
However, the path stretches out into the distance because happiness is a process, not a goal. In other words, you’ll never reach a point where you’re “happy” and don’t need to pursue happiness anymore.
Sharma notes that, while it’s important to have goals and dreams, don’t sacrifice the little joys and pleasures of life to reach them. Live your life now, not at some uncertain time in the future like after retirement or winning the lottery.
The path of diamonds is a reference to Vajrayana Buddhism (vajrayana can be translated as “diamond path” or “diamond way”). Vajrayana teaches that there’s no clear distinction between what people might call good and bad, or holy and profane—it teaches you to accept things for what they are, instead of judging and labeling them. By doing so, you remain present and focused, rather than lost in your own thoughts and judgments.
In simple terms, the path of diamonds represents Sharma’s belief that being fully present in each moment as it happens is like walking down an endless, impossibly beautiful road. According to Sharma, you’ll never reach the end of the path of diamonds, but you’ll be happy for as long as you’re walking on it.
First of all, Sharma says, don’t worry about the past or fear the future. This lesson ties into the concept of a focused mind from Chapter 7—distracting yourself with worries and fears is draining, while putting all of your energy into the present moment is invigorating. Many of the other lessons will help you to be more present and appreciative in each moment as it passes; for example, the Heart of the Rose is all about eliminating distracting thoughts.
Secondly, even in hard times—or perhaps especially then—give thanks for everything you have. For example:
“Live in the moment” is another lesson that bridges many different schools of thought, and therefore one that’s worth thinking about.
Stoicism argues that, rationally, there’s no benefit to worrying about the past or the future; all you can do is make the best choice possible in the present moment.
Hinduism and Buddhism say that you mustn’t let unimportant events take root in your mind. Instead, you should experience each moment as it comes, and then let it go when it’s over.
Any number of secular self-help books suggest the same thing: Dwelling on the past or worrying about the future is a waste of time and energy.
Lori Gottlieb’s memoir Maybe You Should Talk to Someone is all about how she learned to live in the moment. Gottlieb went through an unexpected breakup, which led to a major midlife crisis.
Through therapy and self-reflection, Gottlieb came to realize that the underlying issue was her fear that she’d be alone forever. She was finally able to move past her crisis by learning to appreciate each moment as it happened, rather than worrying about the future or obsessing over the past.
Julian’s last lesson is about Nirvana, a state of perfect happiness and contentment. When you reach Nirvana, you see the beauty in everything and experience no pain. This is the ultimate goal of everything that Julian has said and taught.
You’ll know you’ve reached that stage when you start to notice the divinity in everything around you, from the bloom of a flower to the laugh of a child.
In both Buddhism and Hinduism, Nirvana is the ultimate goal of every living being. However, while Sharma describes Nirvana as a state of perfect peace and happiness, more traditionally it means the end of your individual existence.
According to Buddhism and Hinduism, reaching Nirvana means that your soul unites with God, and you’re freed from the cycle of death and reincarnation. In other words, the lifetime in which you reach Nirvana will be your last.
Those religions see life—and therefore reincarnation—as suffering; they seek to free people from that suffering. In contrast, Sharma is trying to make the life you have more meaningful and enjoyable.
After sharing that final lesson, Julian embraces John and walks out into the morning sun. All he leaves behind is his empty teacup.
Julian’s empty cup is the final image of The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari. It serves as a reminder of the Empty Cup proverb, and a sign that Julian’s own “cup” is still empty, in spite of—or maybe because of—all he’s learned.
Just like Julian, you must remember to keep your cup empty so that you can always fill it with new lessons.